I am a bit more stable in the pressure department until today that is....the headache from the meds and constant up and down is making me crazy....I am also getting puffy today which is not pretty.
I have been thinking alot lately about this time I have had to just sit and be pregnant...There are many good things like I get to enjoy just knowing she is in there kicking the heck out of my internal organs and ribs:) she is a little boxer I know it....How many people work for a place that allows for things like this to happen and still be allowed the time you need after delivery to be with and bond with your baby. I am so lucky.
A con of bedrest while in the hospital is that you have nothing to do but sit and be in your own thoughts...scary really it is....you can start to go a bit mad in your own head as at least for me I have time to overthink every decision, wow it is like giving yourself therapy.
I wonder what she is going to be like? will she look like Chloe? will she get Brady's good hair-straight, brown and thick? Will my issues and her needing to be born early put her at a disadvantage?
I also wonder how Chloe is going to handle this next few months with baby at the hospital and her not being able to see her? Will get her back into the routine that has been broken in the last 12 days?
I have to much time in my own head-a head that is throbbing anyway.....I have to watch more junk TV now, I never knew there was so much nothingness on TV. I think when this is all over I will stick with my Tivo Shows and books,
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Yeah I have a computer again- 11 more days
So I am so happy today as I can blog again about my journey and what a crazy time it has been since I blogged...
Feb 3rd-I finally got into the specialist my OB recommended to see what if anything else could be done about my pressures...if I would have known..
I was admitted to United Hospital that day with the hope of increasing some meds and going home in 2-3 days...well 8 days later here I am but in a bigger room. I have almost tripled the one bp med I was on and anyone who works with me may remember how loopy I was when I did this in the begging, good times. Nothing has really changed them all that much no matter how many meds they keep giving me. I am holding a little more stable for me (pregnant) but not a normal person. I have had a splitting headache for over 2 weeks which is also a huge concern for the doctors right now....I had a head CT and my brain and head is clear and pretty as the dr said...I guess a bonus is no crazy brain tumors right>
The nutty part of this for me has been that my OB has transferred my care and I now 3-4 different drs working on my case and they all had a little different opinion. I finally had it yesterday and told them we need a plan or one idea we are all working on because it is to hard to keep going up and down when I am not really getting better.
I will most likely deliver her on Feb 21st which is over the 32 week point. Sydney is doing wonderful right now going crazy in ribs all day long. She has no harm from this craziness that we can see which is good.
I have met with NICU doctors which is where Sydney will spend the first 4-8 weeks after she is born most likely....they are great and this NICU is the very best in the metro so I am confident with all the people that I have met here that Sydney and I are in good hands....It is a little nerve racking because I am on so many more meds this time that it could take longer to stablize me and my bp and there is a great risk to her at start of csection....good thing I did my last one here so they have my chart and know that I crashed on the table when I got my spinal so they are going to bring a bigger nicu/surgical team in to ensure we get the baby out quickly because when I crash essentially the placenta stops giving her blood....It is scary but we know it so we can be prepared for it right now which I like, having a plan.
Brady has been doing an amazing job with Chloe-I dont get to see them everyday but he is doing so awesome with her....I think this has been good for her so she becomes a little more daddy dependant so when we actually bring Sydney home she is not so mommy, mommy all the time.
I miss them so much, Chloe has only been up a couple of times because my first room was so small miss little destructo had it ripped apart in 5 minutes. I am in a new room and there is more chloe space so that is awesome.
Brady will be able to make it to the state this time as we are having her on Monday so he will be safe to leave on Thursday am if the kids make it.....I am a good wife and sister in-law for making this still work, I think it will come in handy when I want something later:)
I have to go online shop now as I have been without a computer for a week, I will keep you updated if anything changes but I am digging deep to get through the next few days.
Feb 3rd-I finally got into the specialist my OB recommended to see what if anything else could be done about my pressures...if I would have known..
I was admitted to United Hospital that day with the hope of increasing some meds and going home in 2-3 days...well 8 days later here I am but in a bigger room. I have almost tripled the one bp med I was on and anyone who works with me may remember how loopy I was when I did this in the begging, good times. Nothing has really changed them all that much no matter how many meds they keep giving me. I am holding a little more stable for me (pregnant) but not a normal person. I have had a splitting headache for over 2 weeks which is also a huge concern for the doctors right now....I had a head CT and my brain and head is clear and pretty as the dr said...I guess a bonus is no crazy brain tumors right>
The nutty part of this for me has been that my OB has transferred my care and I now 3-4 different drs working on my case and they all had a little different opinion. I finally had it yesterday and told them we need a plan or one idea we are all working on because it is to hard to keep going up and down when I am not really getting better.
I will most likely deliver her on Feb 21st which is over the 32 week point. Sydney is doing wonderful right now going crazy in ribs all day long. She has no harm from this craziness that we can see which is good.
I have met with NICU doctors which is where Sydney will spend the first 4-8 weeks after she is born most likely....they are great and this NICU is the very best in the metro so I am confident with all the people that I have met here that Sydney and I are in good hands....It is a little nerve racking because I am on so many more meds this time that it could take longer to stablize me and my bp and there is a great risk to her at start of csection....good thing I did my last one here so they have my chart and know that I crashed on the table when I got my spinal so they are going to bring a bigger nicu/surgical team in to ensure we get the baby out quickly because when I crash essentially the placenta stops giving her blood....It is scary but we know it so we can be prepared for it right now which I like, having a plan.
Brady has been doing an amazing job with Chloe-I dont get to see them everyday but he is doing so awesome with her....I think this has been good for her so she becomes a little more daddy dependant so when we actually bring Sydney home she is not so mommy, mommy all the time.
I miss them so much, Chloe has only been up a couple of times because my first room was so small miss little destructo had it ripped apart in 5 minutes. I am in a new room and there is more chloe space so that is awesome.
Brady will be able to make it to the state this time as we are having her on Monday so he will be safe to leave on Thursday am if the kids make it.....I am a good wife and sister in-law for making this still work, I think it will come in handy when I want something later:)
I have to go online shop now as I have been without a computer for a week, I will keep you updated if anything changes but I am digging deep to get through the next few days.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Day 8-9 Learning to be Paitent
I have a paitence them going on in my head right now because I am not in control of this situation but they are running mighty thin today.
Over the course of this weekend my BP has taken a turn for the worse steadily increasing since Friday night topping out at 171/108 last night before bed and not really going down....I have been following the DR orders and have not really been doing anything for those of you who know me well this sitting around stuff is hard but I have been doing it, totally letting go of work and just trying to find peace.
Today I had my regular "weekly" date with my OB who said well let's get you checked into the hospital and do some testing/monitoring and I would like to get a second opinion before I make any decisions.
Down to Labor and Delivery I go and when she says what room I am going to be in...I laugh a little and say I know which one I have been it 5 times in 2 years now:) We go through all the motions and testing all the while even laying down in a quiet dark room does not bring down the BP below 160/100. The nurse says there is no way he will let you leave here....15 minutes later she comes back to tell me I can go home but that I have to see the specialist today or tom am at the latest, the DR will be right in.
My labs all come back that my organs are functioning fine right now and I don't have toxemia or pre-clampsia so that is a bonus but I am at high risk of having a stroke from the overall BP.....
Dr tells me that I can go home and he wants me to page him as soon as I am done with the DR and we will make the plan then. I really wanted him to give me the steroids that are needed for the lungs today as I don't know how much longer I can go on like this....my head is killing me....but he said maybe we can do more meds or they will have another solution...lets cross that bridge later....I am not really happy with that answer, I know how awful I feel but am trying to go with it as I cannot control everything.
I haven't heard from the specialist as of 230pm so I call the DR and get their number only to find out that didn't see the part of needing it to be today or early tomorrow so can they call me back and again here I wait....
Don't even get me started on Disability/Benefits providers needing me to give them the same information 6 times and they still don't get anything right:(
I know I am not in a good place right now and I don't want to control the outcome or have all the answers asap-well who am I kidding I do want that but really, I want this headache to go away! It is hard enough to be bed-resting with a 2 year old who doesn't have any clue about Mommy not feeling good it is about Mommy play/read/wrestle/watch TV with me, please:)
I will hopefully hear something soon, poor Brady has just been hanging out all day waiting and again we together have 1/2 the patience that 1 person should have for things like this....he feels bad wanting to help me and wanting to stop the headache but there is not anything he can do except get his medical license and give that second opinion:)
Wish Me Luck and less of a headache please!
Over the course of this weekend my BP has taken a turn for the worse steadily increasing since Friday night topping out at 171/108 last night before bed and not really going down....I have been following the DR orders and have not really been doing anything for those of you who know me well this sitting around stuff is hard but I have been doing it, totally letting go of work and just trying to find peace.
Today I had my regular "weekly" date with my OB who said well let's get you checked into the hospital and do some testing/monitoring and I would like to get a second opinion before I make any decisions.
Down to Labor and Delivery I go and when she says what room I am going to be in...I laugh a little and say I know which one I have been it 5 times in 2 years now:) We go through all the motions and testing all the while even laying down in a quiet dark room does not bring down the BP below 160/100. The nurse says there is no way he will let you leave here....15 minutes later she comes back to tell me I can go home but that I have to see the specialist today or tom am at the latest, the DR will be right in.
My labs all come back that my organs are functioning fine right now and I don't have toxemia or pre-clampsia so that is a bonus but I am at high risk of having a stroke from the overall BP.....
Dr tells me that I can go home and he wants me to page him as soon as I am done with the DR and we will make the plan then. I really wanted him to give me the steroids that are needed for the lungs today as I don't know how much longer I can go on like this....my head is killing me....but he said maybe we can do more meds or they will have another solution...lets cross that bridge later....I am not really happy with that answer, I know how awful I feel but am trying to go with it as I cannot control everything.
I haven't heard from the specialist as of 230pm so I call the DR and get their number only to find out that didn't see the part of needing it to be today or early tomorrow so can they call me back and again here I wait....
Don't even get me started on Disability/Benefits providers needing me to give them the same information 6 times and they still don't get anything right:(
I know I am not in a good place right now and I don't want to control the outcome or have all the answers asap-well who am I kidding I do want that but really, I want this headache to go away! It is hard enough to be bed-resting with a 2 year old who doesn't have any clue about Mommy not feeling good it is about Mommy play/read/wrestle/watch TV with me, please:)
I will hopefully hear something soon, poor Brady has just been hanging out all day waiting and again we together have 1/2 the patience that 1 person should have for things like this....he feels bad wanting to help me and wanting to stop the headache but there is not anything he can do except get his medical license and give that second opinion:)
Wish Me Luck and less of a headache please!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)